Thoroughly enjoyed the letter to Thomas Jefferson!
At 01:43 AM 7/6/98 -0700, you wrote:
>This was just on Humor Digest; Enjoy! Bonnie G...B)
>
>> The Court of King George III
>> London, England
>> July 10, 1776
>>
>> Mr. Thomas Jefferson
>> c/o The Continental Congress
>> Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
>>
>> Dear Mr. Jefferson:
>>
>> We have read your "Declaration of Independence" with great interest.
>> Certainly, it represents a considerable undertaking, and many of your
>> statements do merit serious consideration. Unfortunately, the
>> Declaration as a whole fails to meet recently adopted specifications
>> for proposals to the Crown, so we must return the document to you for
>> further refinement.
>>
>> The questions which follow might assist you in your process of
>> revision:
>>
>>1. In your opening paragraph you use the phrase "the Laws of Nature
>> and Nature's God." What are these laws? In what way are they the
>> criteria on which you base your central arguments? Please document
>> with citations from the recent literature.
>>
>>2. In the same paragraph you refer to the "opinions of mankind."
>> Whose polling data are you using? Without specific evidence, it
>> seems to us the "opinions of mankind" are a matter of opinion.
>>
>>3. You hold certain truths to be "self-evident." Could you please
>> elaborate. If they are as evident as you claim then it should not
>> be difficult for you to locate the appropriate supporting statistics.
>>
>>4. "Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" seem to be the goals
>> of your proposal. These are not measurable goals. If you were to
>> say that "among these is the ability to sustain an average life
>> expectancy in six of the 13 colonies of at last 55 years, and to
>> enable newspapers in the colonies to print news without outside
>> interference, and to raise the average income of the colonists
>> by 10 percent in the next 10 years," these could be measurable
>> goals. Please clarify.
>>
>>5. You state that "Whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive
>> of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish
>> it, and to institute a new Government...." Have you weighed this
>> assertion against all the alternatives? What are the trade-off
>> considerations?
>>
>>6. Your description of the existing situation is quite extensive.
>> Such a long list of grievances should precede the statement of
>> goals, not follow it. Your problem statement needs improvement.
>>
>>7. Your strategy for achieving your goal is not developed at all. You
>> state that the colonies "ought to be Free and Independent States,"
>> and that they are "Absolved from All Allegiance to the British
>> Crown." Who or what must change to achieve this objective? In
>> what way must they change? What specific steps will you take to
>> overcome the resistance? How long will it take? We have found that
>> a little foresight in these areas helps to prevent careless errors
>> later on. How cost-effective are your strategies?
>>
>>8. Who among the list of signatories will be responsible for
>> implementing your strategy? Who conceived it? Who provided the
>> theoretical research? Who will constitute the advisory committee?
>> Please submit an organization chart and vitae of the principal
>> investigators.
>>
>>9. You must include an evaluation design. We have been requiring this
>> since Queen Anne's War.
>>
>>10. What impact will your problem have? Your failure to include any
>> assessment of this inspires little confidence in the long-range
>> prospects of your undertaking.
>>
>>11. Please submit a PERT diagram, an activity chart, itemized budget,
>> and manpower utilization matrix.
>>
>> We hope that these comments prove useful in revising your "Declaration
>> of Independence." We welcome the submission of your revised proposal.
>> Our due date for unsolicited proposals is July 31, 1776. Ten copies
>> with original signatures will be required.
>>
>> Sincerely,
>>
>> Management Analyst to the British Crown
>
>
|
