this is a shorter version of a message that didn't get through:

Carol, you make some good points.  Nevertheless, kids are very resilient and more
comfortable dealing with truth than shadows.  If a student thinks he or she doesn't
'measure up"  to peers, learning more about his or her own extended family could
provide much-needed ammunition when knowledge of overcoming tough times or merely
surviving demonstrates that they come from better stock than they think.  They may
also realize that other families have problems, too.  He or she might even make a
new friend by interviewing a grandparent.