Carol,

I have also read the old newspapers with the listings of battle 
casualties.  Extracts for a few of these newspaper reports can be read at

http://newspaperabstracts.com/

select United States, New York
search "war news"

Also, the officer in charge of the unit sent a condolence note to the 
family. 

This happened when my ancestor John O'Neill, a private serving in the 
49th NYVI,  was killed at Spotsylvania Court House Virginia May 10, 
1864.  The 1st Lieutenant, David Lambert, sent a handwritten note dated 
May 20th to the widow.  The note is now stored in the pension file at 
the National Archives.  My ancestor a farmer enlisted in Jan 1864 and 
was killed 4 months later.  I imagine these notes were typically more 
detailed depending upon how long the soldier had served with the unit.

Regards,
Sheila Lofft Strickland


Regina W. Daly wrote:

>Families usually found out about the death of a loved
>one through the newspapers, both national and local.
>Regina Daly
>
>--- carol kammen <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
>  
>
>>Dear All
>>
>>	I have a feeling I should know the answer to this,
>>but don't.
>>	How were families in upstate New York notified when
>>loved 
>>ones in the Civil War were killed.
>>	I cannot imagine a soldier coming to the door;
>>rather, I 
>>think it must have been a telegram.
>>
>>	Could anyone tell me?
>>
>>	with much appreciation
>>
>>	Carol Kammen
>>	Tompkins County Historian
>>
>>    
>>